twisted wishes

First topic message reminder :

This little game goes like this...someone says "I wish..." whatever.
The next person says, ,"Granted however,..." whatever and try to twist the wish using logic and loopholes.. then post a wish..

"I wish for a woman who loves me."
Go...

Granted but it only works in a stable
I wish that my next wish won't be twisted

Granted, but the rules of the game don't allow it. You're out.
I wish for even more players...

Granted, however the costs for further players to enter is exponentially high thanks to this one's penchant for frivolity.

I wish for a pink pony.

Granted. May it haunt your nightmares forever.
I wish for a nice hot shower...

Granted however, The guards at the castle are kind enough to shower you with boiling pitch as you try to climb the wall.

I wish, I could find a local woman who is not insane who is neither sick, nor dead, nor a relative, who will love me.

Granted, however she has 14 kids and fat.

I wish for a broken pillow.

Granted, but with all the feathers flying through the room it is impossible to sleep.
I wish for my headache to go away without being replaced by another sickness...

Granted, however it goes to your girlfriend and you ain't getting any tonight.

I wish for the library of Alexandria not burned.

Granted, but the Romans could not cope with the Atlantean idea of nuclear fusion, which they found on one of the papyri and destroyed the world long before your birth.
I wish I could sleep for another hour...

Granted but as you fall asleep you realize you left the water running in the bathroom and you wake up in a flooded appartment.

I wish to find a picture for my character!!

Granted, however it's far too modern for this setting!!!


I wish that the kittens would STFU :s

Granted, they all die and now your GF wont stop crying ...

I wish for your GF to stop crying!

Granted, however it's because she took her life due to you killing all the kittens.

I wish for a new family

Granted, although they are all into incest BDSM porn

I wish for a JAS Gripen fighterplane...

Granted. Scale 1:100.000 *hands magnifying glass*
I wish for a win in my next virtual battle...

Granted, but it is all you wil ever win again

I wish for Willhelm to stop beeing funny

Granted, however it is due to you forgetting what is funny.

I wish for magical powers.

Granted but you get them from a demon that now owns your soul and wants you to play scrabble with him for Ever !!

I wish for our rabbit to die!

Granted, but it dies in childbirth, producing lots of offspring.
I wish I had a better condition...

Granted you now live in the playboy mansion as a busboy

I wish I knew everything

Granted, but realising the insignificance of your own life you commit suicide in the next second.
I wish for a good meal...

Granted, but it contains something you are allergic to so good luck eating it ...

I wish for a blue moon

Granted, but a blue werewolf eats you while you admire it.
I wish for a trusty sword...

Granted, but it requires your blood to survie and it quickley consumes your soul!

I wish for a can of coa cola...

Granted. Have fun with your Agave Cola.
I wish for a new suit...